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On A Lighter Note...

Discussion in 'General chit chat' started by Shoto1, Apr 16, 2020.

  1. wiltshirejohn

    wiltshirejohn HW Fanboi

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    . ScreenHunter 70.jpg
    .
    .
    .
    .
    ScreenHunter 72.jpg
     
    lee71, andyhawkx3, twocore and 5 others like this.
  2. Shoto1

    Shoto1 Donator

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  3. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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  4. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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  5. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  6. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  7. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  8. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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    Two great white sharks swimming in the ocean spied survivors of a sunken ship


    "Follow me son" the father shark said to the son shark and they swam
    towards the mass of people.

    "First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing."

    And they did.

    "Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few times with all of our
    fins showing."

    And they did.

    "Now we eat everybody."

    And they did, and when they were both gorged, the son asked,

    "Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first ?

    Why did we swim around and around them ?"

    His wise father replied,

    "because they taste better if you scare the **** out of them first!"
     
  9. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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    A young man goes to his GP stating he has a real problem with his 25" Penis, he says to Doc that all the girls just scream and run away and its really affecting him and can he do anything?
    Well Doc takes a look and says " there is nothing i can do for you, but go and see the Witch down in the woods, she can help you better than i can"
    Young man looks in disbelief but heads to woods anyway where he comes across the Witch.
    Can you help me please as my GP referred myself to you? He then relays his problem to her.
    She says to him, " if you go to pond there is a magic frog, ask frog to marry you and frog says No! Your Penis will be 5" shorter"
    With that he finds frog and asks it to marry him? Straight away his penis is 5" shorter to 20"
    WOW!! he shouts then asks frog to marry him again?
    No said the frog. And zap! Penis is down to 15" he looks down and thinks its still a monster and could do with some more off.
    By this time frog has jumped away and young man chases after it, when he catches up he asks frog again to marry him?
    This time frog replies..." how many times do i have to tell you....NO NO NO!!!!
     
    Inca, andyhawkx3 and Chouchin66 like this.
  10. talyllyn

    talyllyn Posting Addict

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    You’re on a horse.

    You’re being chased by a Lion.

    On your left is a Giraffe.

    On your right a Unicorn.

    What do you do?

    You do the right thing; stop drinking and get off the damn Carousel.
     
  11. talyllyn

    talyllyn Posting Addict

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  12. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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  13. Lostkiwi

    Lostkiwi Tomorrow will be a good day.

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  14. That hurts

    That hurts Barely Active

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    I feel sorry for parents nowadays, you have to be able to explain the birds & the bees, the bees & the bees, the birds & the birds, the birds that used to be bees, the bees that used to be birds, the birds that look like bees plus bees that look like birds but still have a stinger :rolleyes:
     
  15. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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    one for greta from the good old days..

    83872.jpg
     
    Lostkiwi and Chouchin66 like this.
  16. talyllyn

    talyllyn Posting Addict

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    Daughter: Dad, what does ‘gays’ mean?

    Me: You know how mum and dad love each other? Well, two men can love each other the same way.

    Daughter: So what is ‘penetrating gays’?

    Me: Er… read me the whole sentence.

    Her: “She stared at him with a penetrating gaze.”

    Me: Oh.
     
    Chouchin66 likes this.
  17. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  18. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  19. SimonCornwall

    SimonCornwall .

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  20. lee71

    lee71 Posting Addict

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    My niece was same, I filled a bag with catnip at a party and gave it to her. :D
     
    Rob-ontarget likes this.

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