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Little, Mundane Things That Blister Your Nipples.

Discussion in 'Get it off your chest' started by Ragnar Hairybreeks, Nov 9, 2021.

  1. Ragnar Hairybreeks

    Ragnar Hairybreeks Check out my leather balm on Members Manufactured

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    I loved Toblerone, but refused to buy it after they skinnied down the bars to halve the weight in the same volume and price.

    Yesterday I saw a ‘tobleronealike’ product in Aldi. Same stuff, but a proper slab of chocolate (they’ve just changed the orientation of the Alps so they don’t get sued under trademark. Made by Moser Roth.

    Well, just treated myself to a bit. Excellent! But due to the inordinate thickness of the chocolate I was worried about spitting a tooth!
     
  2. Wing Commander

    Wing Commander Keyboard Hero

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    Irritant:
    It never ceases to amaze me how any queue I join in shops always has a problem and grinds to a halt. . I seem to have the "kiss of death" on queues. :rolleyes:

    For example, today I was in the queue at a checkout in a supermarket. The person in front had a problem with two of her items because there was no barcode on them. Naturally, the items were a couple of minutes apart, and both required an assistant to go to find the prices. :rolleyes:

    After packing her shopping into bags, she placed everything back into her trolley. . . . And was then flustered to discover that her handbag was under all her bags and groceries. :rolleyes: :facepalm:.

    After excavating her handbag, she then spent another couple of minutes rummaging around in it to find some "money off" vouchers .... :rolleyes:.
    Then she tried to pay but her card refused to work. . . :rolleyes: :facepalm:
    Eventually she tried another card.... which worked. :up: :)
    She then became engaged in conversation with the lady on the till about her non-functioning card. :facepalm:

    Meanwhile, my frozen goodies are starting to defrost. ... :rolleyes:
    Hey ho, just a typical experience of trying to pay for some shopping.
    It's a great game if you have a robust sense of humour.
    .
     
  3. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    You just wait till you get pregnant :D
     
  4. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    Them chocolate orange things are the same segments have been hollowed out :mad:
     
    Ragnar Hairybreeks likes this.
  5. Brooksy

    Brooksy Keyboard Hero

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    If you see her again fill her trolley with single malt whiskey when she's day dreaming on something else. :thumb:
     
    Wing Commander likes this.
  6. Readie

    Readie Grumpy Old Fart

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    Only time I’ve had blistered nipples was cooking sausages at a nudist camp...
     
  7. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    We had a lad at work years ago went off to some spanish resort came back with a dodgy tattoo round his nipple then tryed to take it off one dinner time with a 4 inch grinder :facepalm: it dident end well :D
     
  8. Readie

    Readie Grumpy Old Fart

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    Ouch...
     
    1260engineer likes this.
  9. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    he was the works crash test dummy. not bright or very clever but could lift heavy things :D
     
    Mr Bond likes this.
  10. Readie

    Readie Grumpy Old Fart

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    We had one of those, “Ted” as he looked a bit like a Teddy Boy.

    You could smoke at work in those days and he spilled a tub of contact adhesive on his bench, ( you can see this coming I bet), his fag set light to his bench and he tried to put it out by slapping out the flames with his hands.

    Anyway, a few months of work with that one.....
     
  11. Readie

    Readie Grumpy Old Fart

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    I do hope “Teds” are still made nowadays, he was one of the kindest guys that would do anything for anyone within his capabilities.
     
    bighit and 1260engineer like this.
  12. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    we use to set ours filleting the RSJ's ready for welding . we he went to the loo we would empty his coke can and fill it with acetylene .well bang was an understatement made very pretty silver flowers . cruel but we are talking about a bloke that lite up a fag in a spray booth :facepalm: luckly it was outside in a container . .
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2021
    bighit and Readie like this.
  13. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    I will tell you something that gets me going :mad: . idiots that dont know the rules of roundabouts when driving . the luckybag licence brigade :mad:
     
  14. bighit

    bighit Pro Poster

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    We had one that spilled flammable liquid in the welding shop. He left it on the floor.
    The fabricator came back and started welding . The liquid pool caught fire.

    Some one walking by saw the flames and grabbed the fabricator and pulled him away.

    CCTV was viewed and the guy that spilled it was seen looking at the spill and walking away.

    He got a final written warning for that.

    A few months later he was using a very high heat pressure washer on an exhaust box in a compressor. ( a zone 2 compressor that had a cooled exhaust system for on oil rigs). The exhaust boxes got caked in carbon so we filled them with TFR and let them soak overnight then pressure washer them out .

    He tied a cable tie round the trigger and handle then went fo a smoke .

    The pressure washer lance fell out of the exhaust box and the water caught some one walking past . Slight burns to his face and lucky he was wearing safety glasses.

    The guy got the boot as he had been warned before about by the HSE guy plus his final warning.
     
    1260engineer and Readie like this.
  15. 1260engineer

    1260engineer The Terminator's Armourer

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    There really are some muppets about :facepalm:
     
    bighit likes this.
  16. chris l

    chris l Posting Addict

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    The cleaner, Alf, old school Londoner, once asked me what situ was, as he had new instructions that all light fittings were to be cleaned 'in situ'

    We sent him to the Stores, having spoken to the storeman, who whipped up 5 litres of situ using blue ink and fairy liquid....I

    Alf dismantled all the light fittings and carefully washed them in this frothy hellish brew... Staining his arms to the elbow and every flat surface for yards around...

    After an hour or so it wasn't so funny and I tried, gently, that he'd been the subject of a practical joke.

    Of this he would have none;
    Fixing me with a beady eye he said...

    "What kind of t**t d'you think I am?"

    Pointing at the carefully labelled bottle


    "Wos that say there?

    F*cking situ

    (Use undiluted)"


    He'll be long dead now, sorry Alf...
     
  17. RodentSlayerUSA

    RodentSlayerUSA Busy Member

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    1. chewing with the mouth open
    2. chewing and making 'smacking' sounds.
    3. old guys (I am old) that don't trim their MUTANT eyebrows
     
    Ragnar Hairybreeks likes this.
  18. TheKiwi

    TheKiwi Band member

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    Rogue apostrophe’s
     
    Balders and Wing Commander like this.
  19. Grey Man

    Grey Man Big Poster

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    ... when the entire goddamned tribe has to stand in the queue as well.
     
    Wing Commander likes this.
  20. TheKiwi

    TheKiwi Band member

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    It’s not just supermarket queues, it’s every time I get on a motorway. When I finally give up waiting and change lanes, that one stops. I feel like mr bean sometimes.
     

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