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Funniest thing I've read in a long time, long story but please read it entirely

Discussion in 'General chit chat' started by andyh, May 11, 2008.

  1. andyh

    andyh Engaging Member

    Messages:
    486
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    Location:
    Wycombe
    This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long
    time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a
    true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a
    recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the
    Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the
    Word Perfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'.

    Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now
    I know why they record these conversations!):

    Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'

    Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'

    Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'

    Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words
    went away.'

    Operator: 'Went away?'

    Caller: 'They disappeared.'

    Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'

    Caller: 'Nothing.'


    Operator: 'Nothing??'

    Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'

    Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'

    Caller: 'How do I tell?'

    Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'

    Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'

    Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'

    Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I
    type.'

    Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
    Caller: 'What's a monitor?'

    Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
    Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'


    Caller: 'I don't know.'

    Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
    power cord goes into it.. Can you see that??'


    Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'


    Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
    plugged into the wall.

    Caller: 'Yes, it is.'

    Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there
    were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'

    Caller: 'No.'

    Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find
    the other cable..'

    Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'

    Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into
    the back of your computer.'

    Caller: 'I can't reach.'

    Operator: 'Uh huh.. Well, can you see if it is??'

    Caller: 'No.'

    Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
    over??'


    Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's
    because it's dark.'

    Operator: 'Dark??'


    Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is
    coming in from the window.

    ' Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'

    Caller: 'I can't.'

    Operator: 'No? Why not??'

    Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'

    Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
    licked now.

    Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer
    came in??'

    Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'

    Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just
    like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought
    it from.'

    Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
    Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'

    Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'

    Operator: 'Tell them you're too f --- ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!'
     
  2. a1gunner

    a1gunner Pro Poster

    Messages:
    6,308
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    0
    Location:
    Cardigan
    that is quite funny.

    there are some real idiots out there.
    i know a few idiots myself...they actually think .22 is better than .177:eek: and im one of them
    how dumb are they:D
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 11, 2008
  3. MOO

    MOO Keyboard Hero

    Messages:
    2,439
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    0
    Location:
    Colchester
    That was really dumb, but then some of the so called experts at Sage are a bit grim, (no offence Nicksi). I have phoned them sometimes wanting to do what I regard as a fairly simple accounting task, sometimes they have an immediate answer but a few have been really dim and got me so exasperated I told them not to bother and hung the call up because they fail to understand a simple request. I wonder how some of them are so called "experts" :down:
     
  4. andyh

    andyh Engaging Member

    Messages:
    486
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Wycombe
    I know what you mean, but they are not experts they only read from a monitor I think. Better off fudging it yourself. Creative accounting is the only way to go,
     

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