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Best Bs You Heard

Discussion in 'Anything Airgun Related' started by Desmond.22, Jun 13, 2019.

  1. MrOvershoot

    MrOvershoot Now just slightly tired

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    Very similar at the barbers last year, bloke cutting hair I'd not seen before was talking at 100 miles an hour most of which you thought just calm down a bit.
    Then he starts to tell a story about someone he knows that's been shooting with an air rifle at a target on a golf club for over a year and never hit it as its over 100 meters away & yet he just picked up the rifle and hits it first time whilst his demonstration as to how he did it while he was talking was the action of him holding a pistol :facepalm:
    I asked him how powerful this pistol was :laff:
    Lets put it this way I didn't get my hair cut that day & the next time i went down there he had been sacked as customers had complained about billy BS
     
    Desmond.22 and Kadushu like this.
  2. Thewelshwonder

    Thewelshwonder Busy Member

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    The fact that @Rattymcrattyface hasn’t been in that special shop opposite Keens :cool:
     
    Rattymcrattyface likes this.
  3. echo1974

    echo1974 Engaging Member

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    Ok mate, in fairness that's not bad @ 100yds, BUT i have done that with a GAT .177 WITH a cork! But i did need a good wind behind me upon discharging the weapon.
     
    bobjen38, Desmond.22 and foxtrott like this.
  4. Quentyn

    Quentyn Engaging Member

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    that gunpower air guns hit harder than other airguns of the same power... thats in a book by a published author
     
  5. squib

    squib Posting Addict

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    The best story I ever heard wasn’t airgun related, but was a classic.
    Working in Truro years ago, we had an agency welder called Dennis. He was a bit of a legend, and had dated many of the page 3 girls of the time. I remember him saying one day that Kathy Lloyd was ok, but she’d ‘let herself go a bit’ after he dumped her.

    He told us this story one day from when he was out working in the Middle East, he was working ‘direct for the sheikh’.

    He’d been asked to go out in the desert to repair a high voltage pylon that was damaged. He hitched the mobile welder to the Land Rover tow bar, and off he set to drive a day across the desert.

    When he got there, he pulled up alongside the faulty pylon, and went to get the welder running. Only the welder wouldn’t go, the Diesel engine on it was kerput.

    Being the resourceful type, he removed the faulty engine from the welder, and replaced it with the engine from the Land Rover.

    With the welder now working, he got his welding leads out of the back of the Land Rover, but as luck would have it, they were too short to reach the repair.

    The only way to do the job was to get the welder closer to the job. He removed the seat belts from the Land Rover, and fashioned a harness to enable him to strap the welder to his back. ( bear in mind this welder needed towing ).

    He scaled the pylon, and carried out the welding repair. In his words, a ten minute job.

    He then climbed down, removed the engine from the welder, put it back in the Land Rover, and rebuilt the welder with the duff engine.

    2 days had now gone by.

    He drove back to the ‘yard’ on the 3rd day. When he parked up, ( this is the bit that got me ) the gaffer came over, and said to him ‘hey Dennis, what f’kin took you so long’
     
    Mortimer, Marky-Boy, bobjen38 and 5 others like this.
  6. echo1974

    echo1974 Engaging Member

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    Hmmm? That could be genuine..................
     
  7. BARNEY20

    BARNEY20 Engaging Member

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    Picking my zx10r up on Saturday, got talking to a bloke on a generic 125,that had a standard 98 R1 that did 211mph.lol
     
    Eurodemon, Neil Curtis and Morris147 like this.
  8. thumbhole

    thumbhole Posting Addict

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    Technical term in the trade is they squeak not leak. :thumb:
     
    mmamonster likes this.
  9. Dr B

    Dr B Getting old

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    Well your honour, to be honest its not really Necrophilia, as she was alive when I started. :facepalm::facepalm:
     
  10. Morris147

    Morris147 Engaging Member

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    Mine doesnt.....

    Being a lefty i can shoot equally as good with my right :laff:
     
  11. Rattymcrattyface

    Rattymcrattyface Nobody's honkin' Manilow

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    ha!! i always avert my eyes WW :):):):thumb:
     
    Thewelshwonder likes this.
  12. Bunny-on-Bunny

    Bunny-on-Bunny Engaging Member

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    May have been the same guy who asked me to:
    "Fit a triple powerband and double time the ignition" to his Zxr750.
     
    BARNEY20 likes this.
  13. Bunny-on-Bunny

    Bunny-on-Bunny Engaging Member

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    When people tell me this, I ask what the gun weighs and how they conduct the test with my 'special face' that hits them in their densest spot.
     
  14. Guloluseus

    Guloluseus Ultimate Gun Showroom!

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    "theres no way you can hit THAT at 150 yards standing.. its impossible!"

    "Oh. you did it, Guess its easy, my turn"

    "f*** it. you got lucky"

    :laff::laff:
     
  15. Desmond.22

    Desmond.22 Posting Addict

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    Nice stories boyz.

    Obviously not the only bs man around. Think most ppl dont know much on air guns etc so people prob never challenge them.

    Bet that story started at 15 yds and 20 people later hes at 100 yds.

    Maybe if we ever meet again it will 3 miles but it was a calm day
     
  16. Bunny-on-Bunny

    Bunny-on-Bunny Engaging Member

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    One had an 'engineer' tell me - via ranting' - that Copper (Cu) nuts shrink on threads when heat is applied.
     
  17. Wing Commander

    Wing Commander Busy Member

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    Me talking to myself and saying, "I am just going to the gun shop for a tin of pellets."
     
    Tyler durdon, ibo7, N.Vodden and 2 others like this.
  18. StellaArtois Sr

    StellaArtois Sr Springer Whore

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    I have actually said that many times.
    Although I don't need anymore, It certainly hasn't stopped me wanting more, and getting them.:up:
    Ade :thumb:
     
    Wofty likes this.
  19. Mr wolf

    Mr wolf Sad times

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    Hit the wallet harder with the unreliability and repair costs
     
    Mike.lewis likes this.
  20. edtwozeronine

    edtwozeronine Donator

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    I'm surprised people use cheques any more, bank cards are no longer cheque guarantee cards these days.
     
    littleJon365 likes this.

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